It all hinges on how much you can hold in your cheeks.

Overheard at UMBC — Fri, 27 Jun 2008 03:04:57 +0000

Suitemate 1: You need to clean the bathroom.
Suitemate 2: We’ll just do the water thing we usually do.

Overheard in Harbor Hall
by Bekka

Wasn’t this basically the plot to Oedipus?

Overheard at UMBC — Fri, 27 Jun 2008 02:52:31 +0000

Girl 1: I try to be as ugly as possible whenever I’m around him. And he calls my mom, ‘mom’.
Girl 2: Yeah, eww.
Girl 1: But she actually kind of IS his mom…

Overheard on the sidewalk by Susquehanna

by David

This lecture brought to you by the Baltimore Friends of Pot Parties

Overheard at UMBC — Fri, 20 Jun 2008 03:14:58 +0000

Older Professor: “Everyone has pot-parties, why don’t you?” Now what would be comparable for today? “Everyone has granite countertops, why don’t you?”

Overheard in a Sociology class, Sondheim Building
by Hickleper

She’s moving on to asphyxiation I guess.

Overheard at UMBC — Fri, 20 Jun 2008 03:14:28 +0000

Girl: For next semester, I definitely need to stock up on Ziplock bags because I get injured so much. Even when I’m sober. I bruise like a summer fruit.

Overheard in the Library
by Lisa

So I’ll have to steal a suit.

Overheard at UMBC — Wed, 28 May 2008 18:33:12 +0000

Guy: You know those guys? Who wear the suits everyday? I want to be one of those guys.

Overheard on the stairs next to the Fine Arts Building
by RichardMNixon

Premium, but with a hint of perineum.

Overheard at UMBC — Tue, 27 May 2008 21:59:44 +0000

Student 1: This chicken is so premium.
Student 2: I took a dump in the soup pot.

Overheard in the Dining Hall, Salad Side
by Bekka

Now follow me over to the Erickson School!

Overheard at UMBC — Mon, 26 May 2008 21:56:33 +0000

Professor: If I do nothing else, I can teach you how to taunt the elderly.

Overheard in a Philosophy class, Academic IV
by Hickleper

Scientific evidence that UMBC makes you dumb.

Overheard at UMBC — Sun, 25 May 2008 21:49:54 +0000

(Professor struggles with a simple subtraction problem.)
Professor: I took the SAT in 6th grade to get into an advanced math class, and I beat 50% of that year’s college bound seniors. Look at me now.

Overheard in a class, Sondheim Hall
by Jason

That’s an interesting interpretation of “Love thy neighbor”…

Overheard at UMBC — Sat, 24 May 2008 21:47:24 +0000

Professor: What would Jesus do? Jesus would kill the tards.

Overheard in Lecture Hall 4, Academic IV Building
by viva_espain

Like, totally not cool.

Overheard at UMBC — Fri, 23 May 2008 21:41:44 +0000

Ditz: But, see, Ava was Hitler’s wife and that’s not cool.

Overheard in the finals study room, University Center
by Gem